Cash Machines & Suits

When HSBC decided they could no longer be bothered to provide a local bank branch in Milford on Sea some months ago, we always knew the ATM cash machine would only stay for a while after they left . Well it is still here, but for how much longer?

Ever enterprising, the Co-op now have a cash machine installed in the rear of their store, and Mark at The Village News, applied to have a 24 hour ATM cash machine installed in the front of his shop. All sounded a reasonable replacement for the anticipated lost cash dispensing service, and more importantly these actions would ensure that locals and visitors alike could easily get cash to spend in the village.

All was going well, Mark had surveyors call from HSBC bank to check his security and to look at structural reinforcement for the area around the intended cash machine. All was agreed and a planning application was then submitted.

Guess what, the suits have now scuppered the plan. Apparently, the planning application for the cash machine in The Village News has been rejected by the NFDC on the grounds that it offends the aesthetics of the shop front and village. Not being rude, but have you seen the front of Mark's shop, and the sixties style shop front gloriously painted with the dye from over 10,000 bananas. It is simply a newsagents shop, a fine type of newsagents shop indeed, but and a far as my research could tell neither Christopher Wren, nor Norman Foster had a hand in the architectural design. It was also considered the cash machine location would be dangerous due to the footpath width, the concern being that people would dive directly in front of oncoming traffic should someone be using it.

Firstly, if there was a cash machine outside HSBC, how can effectively moving the service 50 yards affect the village aesthetics any differently? Also, do they have any comprehension the impact of not being able to get hold of cash will have on our village economy. Our Parish Council recommended permission and confirmed the village needs an ATM. Unfortunately their comment that they “do have concerns that the cash machine may not look very attractive’ may have inadvertently given the council support for their refusal.

Of course the Coop's effort is to be applauded and it does provide an useful in-store mini cash facility for us all The only problem is, it is only available during opening hours and being small, it is likely to run out of cash in times of high usage, with refilling taking a day or two.

On reading the Planning Application refusal on the NFDC website I was comforted to discover that; “In coming to this recommendation, consideration has been given to the rights set out in Article 8 (Right to respect for private and family life) and Article 1 of the First Protocol (Right to peaceful enjoyment of possessions) of the European Convention on Human Rights.” That’s good then. A bit of a shame that one of the NFDC’s planning criteria isn’t ‘Will this help struggling small village businesses in a difficult economic time’.

Ironically, this is the same planning department who approved the irrelevant monster signs on the seafront, and at some stage thought approving change of use from shops to housing was a good idea. As a result we now have a High Street split in two.

Mark is now speaking to HSBC to see if anything can be done under appeal. Things get quite confusing at my age, as it was only a few months ago that I was lambasting HSBC for leaving, and now I am on their side in getting the ATM into The Village News. Life’s twists and turns always keep me amused.

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If you have any views you would like to express, please feel free to post a comment below.

Deauville Diary – Week Three

The Gallic misadventures of a Milford village idiot abroad.

Sunday: After the gang arrived the night before we all slowly arose with mild hangovers. Bouncing down the stairs, Joy told me that she had baked one of her famous Victoria Sponges for my wife and I, just as I was about to say ‘thank you’, she exclaimed; “But we’ve eaten it, it looked nicer than what was available in the motorway services.”

Mum, Pete, my brother & Nic, moi sister in law and two good friends, Gary & Joy fancied seeing a French Market today, so off we set in a two car convoy to the adjoining town, Trouville. Being awash with people and cars, I got out to look for a space as our UK convoy queued for the car park. On my return, no convoy. Easy, I thought, I will call them - No phone. I’ll go and have a coffee then - No wallet. Half an hour later a bemused Englishman called Gary arrived saying; “I didn’t realise you had got out of the car.”

Eventually, we all parked and went to explore Trouville’s large riverside market. An explosion of colour and sound with a traditional carousel, clothes stalls and food galore greeted us. Sausages and cold meats of every description, most I suspect filled with gizzards, tripe or random offal, all things that the French seem to delight in devouring. There was even a stall selling live hermit crabs with multicoloured hand-painted shells. (See picture) Cider and Calvados was of course plentiful and a trip to the crepe and ‘fondante au pomme’ stall was delicious.

Trouville is also famous for its Fish Market so we decided to have fresh fish for dinner. Crevettes Rose cocktail for a starter, followed by a double fish course of sole and gurnard wrapped in Parma ham, all served with sautéed potatoes, shallots and fresh vegetables. Peter cooked, as he has skills in the kitchen that would suit a fine restaurant. His nickname of ‘Perfect Pete’ is irritatingly well founded.

We rounded off the evening by once again drinking too much. It was during this time that I made a fateful mistake in informing everyone that the French do not have their own word for ‘carousel’. I then gave some other examples; ‘boutique’, ‘café’, ‘baguette’ etc. Little did I know how this would haunt me over the coming days! I then suggested we turn on the ‘French language only’ TV we have, but no-one seemed enthusiastic about my offer to translate each programme for them. At one stage someone did mention Peter’s guitar, but fortunately I moved swiftly enough to change the subject, - drinking seemed the correct and main objective of the night.

Monday: Up early, I wanted to greet everyone with ‘Good Morning’ in French, but they do not have such a saying. So, it was simply, bonjour, then French stuff for breakfast, before a whistle-stop tour of the towns sites. This was followed by a hot chocolate whilst people watching outside a café in the town square. The weather was perfect as I guided my entourage to the Deauville-La Touques Racecourse for an afternoon of horse racing. On arriving, everything seemed a bit quiet, and once inside there was not a horse in sight. Ah, wrong racecourse. With all of the composure of ‘Brendan from Coach Trip’ I gathered my un-amused group and redirected them a mile or so down the road. Entry was free to Deauville Clairefontaine Racecourse and there were actually horses there. The course is famed for its flowers and even in October the quaint buildings and beds were bedecked with triumphant colour. We did consider betting, but even this was too confusing for a Francophile such as myself. No worries, the afternoon’s ambience was perfect entertainment alone.

Tonight was Gary’s turn to cook, and being a retired fireman he prepared enough tasty food for a watch of twenty hulking firefighters. As the evening got late we were catching up with stories about family, distant relatives and long-time friends, which if overheard would have sounded more like an episode of the Jeremy Kyle Show. Mum then grinned and told a story about a school friend we had, that none of us could remember, who had been abducted by the Moonies. As the drink flowed, life became even more surreal, when our guests then decided to play a game of ‘Words the French don’t have their own word for’. The resulting sentence; “We watched the Grand prix, then went to the boutique to buy some lingerie and a basque which will be ideal for using for burlesque, oh la la! As we entered the restaurant, run by a local entrepreneur, and just down the boulevard in a cul de sac, the sommelier offered us champagne and the hors d'oeuvres and amuse-bouche were accompanied by a linen serviette. We were then given the la carte menu which had desserts like; meringue, eclairs, gateaux or flambé bananas, with petit fours followed by liqueur. The maitre d, whose name was Philippe Flop, was wearing a cravat and was from Bordeaux. He had previously worked in a bistro next to a menagerie, which had specialised in croissant with mayonnaise, vol-au-vents, and quiche with mange tout. Philippe proved to be a bit of a raconteur, as he told how his sister had once had a liaison in a hairdressing salon with Danny La Rue……...”, I simply stood on the balcony and threatened to jump unless they stopped! As things returned to a sort of normal, in turn, each of our party swivelled to looked at the framed object in the room. My brother then said; “I wonder what the French call a French Door, … or a French kiss,… or a French letter.” I was soon on the balcony again.

Tuesday: Empty house again after guest departed following breakfast, - spent rest of day recovering.

Wednesday: Called to introduce myself to the Mayor, but receptionist at ‘La Mairie’ pretended she did not understand my French. I decided to come back when someone who spoke proper French was on duty.

Thursday: On one of our many daily beach strolls whilst walking the dogs, we today met a couple walking a fine Newfoundland. As the dogs greeted each other, in a way only dogs can, I stopped and chatted to the owners. “Le bon chien, et le grande chien” I commented. ‘Oui, merci monsieur” they replied. Obviously they wanted to chat with a fellow French person, so we then went on to have more in-depth conversation. I was a bit surprised to find out they had not heard of Charles Aznavour. Even when I sang the first four verses of ‘She’, it did not shift their memory. As they left, they wished us both ‘au revoir’, mounted their Newfoundland and rode off into the sunset, only pausing to give my wife a sympathetic smile. Meandering our way across the sand my wife told me how impressed she was with me. Sometimes she gets the words ‘embarrassed’ and ‘impressed’ mixed up, but I knew she was right this time. “What do you think you said at the end?” my wife sweetly enquired, ‘I told them our dinner was in the oven.” “You do realise” she growled; “You actually just told that couple something like ‘We must go now as I have locked my grandmother in the fridge’.” One deft kick of my heals with a pair of size 5 ladies walking boots and my face was flat in the sand.

Friday: Went to get more baguettes, now eating three two footers a day.

www.deauville.org/en

Fred Dine(age)s at Verveine

A little bird spotted Fred Dineage (MBE) and his lovely wife dining at Verveine last Saturday lunchtime. Fred is of course one of the longest-serving broadcasters on ITV.  He was the front man for the coverage of two Olympic Games, and today of course is the main host of Meridian Tonight.

Many of us will remember Fred from when he presented 'HOW?', the longest- running children's programme on TV.  Fred was a host from 1966 to 1981, and responsible for me learning numerous, and mostly useless facts, during my childhood.

Quick Quiz: Do you remember the names of the other hosts on ‘HOW?’ (Answers below)

My guess is Fred was attracted to Milford on Sea, on hearing that Verveine Fishmarket Restaurant was the winner of both the Hampshire Life ‘Restaurant of the Year’, and by David Wykes being the ‘Chef of the Year.’

Ironically, last weekend David had a bit of a drama and was rushed into hospital with a septic hernia. Following his operation I sent Dave a text; "Septic Hernia?  Didn't I see you reading a recipe for that last week."  Sadly, I am unable to print his reply.  During David's recupperation, Stacey had to step in to head up the kitchen for a number of sittings, and she still managed to get a five star rating from a diner on Trip Advisor.

Anyway, back to Fred. I wonder if when Jackie told him that Verveine make their own corned beef, wouldn’t it have been lovely if Fred had simply replied: “HOW?”

http://www.verveine.co.uk/
www.itv.com/meridian-west/meettheteam

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Quick Quiz Answer: Jack Hargreaves, Bunty James, Jon Miller & Fred Dineage.

All change at Belle Epoque

As you may have spotted, changes are afoot at Belle Epoque in Milford on Sea. The old wine bar is currently undergoing a transformation into a Bistro which we understand will include pizza as part of the menu. We are currently contacting the new restaurateurs to get the full the inside story.

The new Milford on Sea eatery we are guessing will be called The Raft, and plans to open in the next couple of weeks. They are looking for a chef and waiting/bar staff, so if you or anyone you know are interested please give Clemie a call on: 01590 645300 or 07837 630020.

When Mike originally opened Belle Epoque a couple of years ago it was immediately clear that Mike was certainly going to do things his own way. Mike’s quirky wine bar soon became popular, and the eclectic mix of furniture and decoration was an experience in itself. Added to this, the extraordinary wine and food prices were another example of Mike’s maverick approach. We suspect the business was never about making money, but just having a good time. A visit to Belle Epoque was certainly always an experience, and we are looking forward to a new experience when the doors reopen under new management soon. We are not sure what Mike’s future plans are, but whatever he chooses, we wish him well.

This new addition to the dining scene in Milford on Sea, is yet another step towards our village becoming the hottest ‘Foodie Destination’ on the coast. Let’s keep eating I say!

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One of our readers & Belle Epqoue customer, Marguerite Willcox, sent in this little ditty (I think we may have our very own Milford on Sea Poet Laureate here)

So farewell then, Belle Epoque!
Your guv'nor was whacky
But he kept a decent stock.
You were a good place to go
For a sup and a talk
And you were fondly known as
Belly Pork.......

New website for Bon Appetit

Our local Milford on Sea village creperie, Bon Appetit, has launched a new website. Being almost French now, I am able to fully appreciated the delight of the sweet or savoury crepes that Christina offers. The tasty filled baguettes could be from a fine Deauville boulangerie and the fresh English breakfasts and homemade British cakes are worth a visit alone.

In my travel’s I have discovered that the French do not have their own word for ‘creperie’, strange that.

If you would like to take a look at Bon Appetit’s new website, here is the link:

http://www.bonappetit-milford-on-sea.co.uk/

Parishioner support in difficult times

If you, or a member of your family, a friend or neighbour or someone you know in the parish needs financial help to get through a difficulty then you may wish to contact Milford United Charities. They are able to offer financial support on a once-off basis to those people who live within the ecclesiastical parish of Milford on Sea, and who need financial help to further their education or training or who face an unexpected financial demand to respond to a personal emergency.

This village charity has supported the development of individuals within the parish of Milford on Sea for over one hundred years. (Since 1906). The Welfare State has in many cases now stepped in to replace their endeavours, however there remain a number of exceptional circumstances in which they are still able to play a positive role.

In recent years they have contributed towards educational and vocational course fees, travel costs to college and exceptional costs to visit sick relatives.

If you feel that your, or anyone you knows circumstances may be helped by support from Milford United Charities please contact one of the Trustees below:

Christopher Beeton: 01590 644609
Rev Dominic Furness: 01590 643289
David Newnham: 01590 674288
Christopher Sanders: 01590 644844

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Milford United Charities (Charity Commission Registered Number 234709)

Queen's Diamond Jubilee Celebrations

The Milford on Sea Village Community Committee are in the process of planning village celebrations for the Queen's Diamond Jubilee on Saturday 2nd June 2012.

The Village Hall and Green have already been booked, and a Children’s Tea Party is the first event to have been penciled in. Plenty more information on the celebrations will follow, but for now it might be worth putting the 2nd June in your diary for a fun day out.

Keep your thatch safe

The Hampshire Fire and Rescue Service has developed Thatch Information Pack for fire safety. Whilst the information pack does not appear to include specific fire safety information for gentlemen with wigs, on reading their advice it looks like the same principles apply.

There are over 800 thatched properties in the New Forest and as winter fast approaches Hampshire Fire and Rescue Service is urging owners and occupants of thatched properties to take extra care before the colder weather arrives to reduce the risk of fire. Our parish has 8 or 9 thatched buildings, so the information may be useful for them.

To read the full information pack please visit:

http://www.hantsfire.gov.uk/yoursafety/athome/thatchfires/thatchinformation.htm

Deauville Diary – Week Two

The Gallic misadventures of a Milford village idiot abroad.

Sunday: My birthday! – and my wife has to be nice to me for one day. We had whole lobster in restaurant, for only £26! Amusingly, I asked if it was French lobster (I asked the waiter, not the lobster) and he said “Non, no one can afford to buy French lobsters!”

Click image to enlarge

Monday: Expecting our first guests, Tim (my wife’s Dad) and Eddie (Tim’s biker friend), we set off on a trip to the supermarket to get some food in, I was loitering & drooling around the patisserie when I was attacked like a deranged Legionnaire by my wife. “You don’t want any of that!” she exclaimed. I quickly replied; “I was looking for something for your Dad.” Top move on my part, and I was spared further pain when she replied; “Oh, that’s OK then, get him something nice.” What a Daddy’s girl!

Tim and Eddie arrived, it had been a good day for a motorcycle ride, only rained most of the way. Both were previously ‘CHIPS Style’ motorbike cops, so they had enthusiastically accepted the invitation to inspect the French road laws. Swathed in leather and looking severely bedraggled, they pulled into the drive. Not sure what the neighbours made of the two monster bikes with leather clad riders dismounting, but thankfully neither of them had their formerly large moustaches from the seventies and it wasn’t ‘Gay Pride Week’ in Deauville.

Tuesday-Wednesday: As the guys regularly do road trips, they have become a cross between a perfect married couple and The Chuckle Brothers. The boys spent their days with us exploring and playing on the ‘D-Day Beaches, as well as discovering unexpected parts of Normandy. Each evening they meticulously planned their routes, calculated journey times and discussed what to eat and where. Then, on leaving our drive promptly got lost each day.

Thursday: Before the guys set off for home the next day we decided to have a meal out in one of the many local restaurants. Eddie’s meal of ‘langoustines’ arrived, the giant prawns looked quite plump and ever so slightly vicious. Alongside Eddie’s plate the waiter had left a sachet with an image of a large lemon on. As we all tucked in, Eddie opened the sachet and started squeezing the wet wipe with what he thought was lemon juice for his prawns. My wife and her dad sat dumbstruck, and knowing it would be impolite to laugh, I simply exploded into a fit of giggles falling to the floor and writhing about uncontrollably. So as not to embarrass our guest, I quickly pretended I had just recalled a joke I had heard this morning about Paul McCartney’s first row with his new wife, apparently she is spending twice as much on shoes as his last wife.

Friday: Finished third book and twentieth baguette. Mum, brother & sister in law and two good friends arriving tomorrow. This is sure to be traumatic, hope Peter hasn’t bought his guitar!

www.deauville.org/en

New additions at Braxton Gardens

Since reopening Braxton Gardens in Milford on Sea during May 2011 Simon and Sarah Relph’s plans are going from strength to strength. The tea room, run by Sarah, has been renamed Muffins Galore!, and now serve homemade muffins, cream teas, plain, fruit & gluten free scones and light lunches. The latest addition is the covered canopy area with a log burner, which is now a cosy place to enjoy tea and lunch in the colder months.

The gardens themselves have now been transformed to a level of tranquility and beauty. The gardens are constantly being tended and nurtured by Simon, with a new vegetable corner with carrots, beans, rocket and lettuce growing and the new herb corner which has been planted with rosemary, angelica, mint and calendula to name a few. There are three mature fruit trees at Braxton situated in the walled garden. A Mulberry, a Fig and a Quince which we have made jam from available in the shop adjacent to the kitchen.

As well as the perfectly striped lawns there is a lily pool to explore, where the fish are illusive (but there!), Braxton’s retail nursery is now open where you can purchase your herbs for your herb garden, herbaceous perennials grown from Braxton’s mother plants and your favourite David Austin Roses.

Braxton Gardens are now open Tuesday to Sunday all year round, why not pop down and take in the ‘new look’?

Braxton Gardens, Lymore Lane, Milford on-Sea, SO41 0TX
http://www.atbraxtongardens.com/
hello@atbraxtongardens.com
Tel: 01590 643601

Match your colours

Louise Stewart Gillespie-Smith (Daughter of Stewart Gillespie-Smith, Assistant Warden at All Saints’ Church) has just moved into Milford on Sea from London for a few months. For the past 7 years, Louise has run her own image consultant business in London where she gives people advice on the most flattering colours and styles of clothing for them to wear to look their best and feel good about themselves. She has also worked with Gok Wan, the TV stylist on her career travels. Also a qualified life coach, enables Louise to combine her coaching skills to help people feel good about themselves and raise their self confidence.

Louise is happy to provide her services to anyone locally whilst she is in the village, so if you are interested you can contact her below:

louise@createyourself.co.uk
http://www.createyourself.co.uk/

Deauville Diary – Week One

The Gallic misadventures of a Milford village idiot abroad.

Week one of our emigration has passed with little trauma or dramatic incident. I suspect that has something to do with the fact that my wife has spent most of it sleeping and dribbling. At the same time I have been enchanting many a shop assistant with my version of their language. Indeed I now look so French that on Tuesday a driver pulled over to ask me directions, as a local I of course immediately gave him the help he needed, but for some reason he seemed a lot more confused as he drove off.

Yesterday we ventured out to a local bistro (That’s French for Café) imagine my relief when I said to my wife; “What would you like my petit pois?” and she lovingly replied; “moules et frites vous grande porc.” Phew, I had been having cold sweat that she might choose the ‘sole meuniere’ on the menu at £46, yes, forty six of your English pounds! Reckon I could get two for that price at Verveine. At lunch today we nearly made the mistake for ordering ‘bulot mayonnaise’, luckily I recognised the waiter’s mime identifying ‘sea snails’ before my English wife placed her order. What would she do without me? It looks like eating out is going to be an adventure in itself, that’s if we can continue to afford it!

www.deauville.org/en